"Welcome home!" Dipper says as soon as Wirt opens the door. Wirt smiles; this is definitely the best thing to come out of giving Dipper a key to the apartmet. The only key actually, as the door merely springs open for him whenever he touches it. "How was your day?"
"It was good. I wrote five more pages, and called Greg" Wirt says. He hangs up his jacket from a branch that sprouts from the wall to hold it. The poetry book is coming along much better than he expected when he began writing it a few months ago. "Yours?" he asks, turning to walk towards Dipper. He's sitting at the couch, and well well well, looks like it's cuddle o'clock.
"Amazing. We had spring cleaning at the shack, and we found some fun old things" says Dipper, closing the bathroom door behind him. Wirt freezes, and his mind begins running through the possibilities. Especially in a place like Gravity Falls, there's so many different reasons this could be happening, and none of them is exactly calming.
"Why's there two of you?" He asks.
"Actually" says a third Dipper, leaning against the threshold of Wirt's bedroom. "That one on the couch is Tyrone 2.0"
"Ty for short" the Dipper on the couch winks an eye at Wirt.
"And the other one is Benny" says who Wirt is starting to suspect is the real Dipper.
"It's Swedish" Benny adds behind Wirt.
"And you're my weird fiance that just brought two clones of himself into my house?"
"Listen Wirt" and that is definitely his Dipper, unless the clones can replicate the exact pattern his heartbeat takes when he gets excited. Wirt used to freak out about being able to sense that, but he eventually had to admit that being a human's natural predator comes in handy sometimes. This is an unexpected one, but hey, since when is his life predictable? "Sometimes you find a magical copy machine, and you gotta take advantage of it. Now, these two will last until they get wet and based on my past experience that's a surprisingly small window, are you in or not?"
"Am I... In?" Wirt frowns, puzzled.
Dipper 2 -Tyrone?- snorts "You said he was smart"
"He is" Dipper throws his clone a glare "Give him a moment to catch up"
"Would it help if I get naked?" Benny asks, and Wirt chokes on air as his face heats up.
"What?!" he asks after he's done coughing a lung out. "Is that why you made them?!"
"Oh, don't worry about that! We were both into the idea" Benny steps up to him, and sure enough he's taken his shirt off.
"Very into it." Ty grins. Wirt's face is beginning to feel like you could cook a meal on it "I mean it's gonna be a bit tricky because we'll melt if we get wet but-" the clone stops talking when Wirt lifts a hand in a time out motion.
Wirt looks at the bedroom door, where Dipper's waiting.
He still looks flushed, but also amused at the predicament Wirt finds himself in, which is complete and utter bullshit. You don't get to magically clone yourself for sexual purposes and find your partner's confusion amusing. Especially because now Wirt's mind is running over a completely different set of possibilities.
"So?" Dipper asks, like the absolute ass cannot see every single houseplant in Wirt's apartment spontaneously growing new leaves and some hopeful blossoms. "What's the verdict?"
Wirt narrows his eyes, and pulls Tyrone up by his collar. Ever so helpful, Benny sticks himself to his side.
"Give me a lock of your hair and I'll make them impermeable for the rest of the night"
Dipper grins.