Osomatsu pushes his face into the crevice of his red sweatshirt sleeve, letting out a slow exhale through his alcohol-slick pursed lips. The empty glass slides from his grip and he pushes it forward towards Chibita, the other giving a disapproving scoff and a shake of his head in response, returning to his task of wiping the ladle clean for the shop's closure in ten minutes or so.
"That's your last one, idjit." He mumbles, not bothering to look up to catch the dark-brunette's frown of disapproval.
"I mean it. Where are the other neets today? You haven't said anything about them since you got here."
"Sleeping? I guess. I don't know." He reaches into his front jeans pocket as if to retrieve his wallet, Chibita pausing his ministrations on drying the oden label to peek up at him in surprise to see if he's actually going to pay his due today, but Osomatsu gives a defeated shrug and stands from his spot. The other sighs and rolls his eyes.
"Put it on Todomatsu's tab this time."
"What a good older brother you are, idjit."
Oso turns to leave after that, Chibita's comment not affecting him in the slightest. His steps are uneven and just a bit wobbly as he tucks his hands into his pockets and makes for his house, the street lights that pass overhead as he walks seeming to be just a bit too damn bright for his liking, so he keeps his gaze either closed or focused on the concrete below his feet. It's a short journey home, so he's only going to have to deal with the inebriated stupor that's settled its way into his system for a minute or two longer before he can rest.
Once he arrives at the front door, he checks his phone and notes the time of 01:24. His younger brothers are definitely sleeping, so he tries his best out of mutual respect to not wake them when he gets ready to lay beside them for some sleep, too.
Some scoping around the house reveals that they are in fact sleeping, which is just as he'd thought. Oso goes about his nightly routine in the same manner as he did every night, but after he's buttoned up his pajama shirt in the bathroom, he can't help but let his tired eyes find the mirror above the sink. He takes a minute to examine himself.
He has pretty normal eyes, though they were nothing compared to Todo's bright and characteristically soft caramel irises. His hair wasn't as sleek and pristine as Kara's, his arms weren't as built and strong as Jyushi's, his body wasn't as soft or plump as Ichi's and his expression was never serious or focused like Choro's. He thought his overall character looked pretty normal... but negatively bland. There wasn't anything notably special about him. He was just the eldest brother and nothing more.
Osomatsu pushes that thought from his mind and switches the bathroom light off, making his quiet way down the hall and towards the futon. He makes sure to keep his movements light as he slips under the covers, but after those few moments, he's out and snoring like the rest of his younger brothers.
--
"Osomatsu nii-san!" Osomatsu awoke with a startled snort mid-snore, eyes popping open and flicking above himself to find Choro, bent over himself with his hands crossed over his chest. Narrowed eyes peer down at him.
"Get up! I'm trying to read and you've been asleep snoring well passed 12!" Choromatsu emphasizes his current frustration with a kick to his brother's back side, making the other groan and roll over to push himself to his feet, albeit a bit hesitantly.
"The rest of us have been up for hours-"
"Yeah, yeah. I got that." The eldest of the two waves him off simply, rubbing the sleep from his eyes as he finally stands to his feet. He gives a stretch, yawning rather loudly and prolonged that Choro gives an impatient huff as he watches him.
"You gonna help me with this?" Oso questions pretty simply, motioning down towards the unkempt futon where he had been sleeping less than soundlessly moments earlier.
Choromatsu scoffs in disbelief and shakes his head, an acrimonious tone lacing his words as he speaks up with a retort.
"As if. Take responsibility for something for once." He makes his way towards the door, mumbling stuff under his breath that Oso doesn't quite take note of with all the shuffling he was doing in trying to collect all six pillows. He knows he caught the word 'disgrace'.
He actually had to snort. Just because he woke up late and asked for help with folding all the blankets makes him a disgrace? That was almost actually funny, Choromatsu.
--
Osomatsu took a walk around the block as the day went on, something he barely ever did but with the house void of his younger siblings he figures his normal afternoon smoke break could be accompanied by a trip down his street.
He brings the end of the cigarette bud to his lips, sucking out what was left of it before flicking it down to the curb and grinding it into the concrete with the heel of his red shoe. His hands find themselves to collect back into the warmness of his sweatshirt pockets, the remaining smoke dissipating into the cool evening air as he exhales.
Osomatsu pauses on the street corner he's rounded just for a moment, thoughts swirling around in his head of everything that's happened today, and its only been three hours since he awoke at noon! Amazing.
Choro's usual scolding never got under his skin since he was always spouting about how he should be the eldest, but something he'd overheard his mom talking about in the other room with his father struck a particular cord in himself that continued to ring well after he was finished eavesdropping. Oso figures his parents talk a lot about the topic of their kids someday leaving their well-sheltered nest and he brushes off most of their chitchats as simple playful banter between parents, but whenever his name is brought up, he can never imagine an excuse for their current topic. Something he overheard today was "... he is the eldest of the six... you'd think he would've accomplish something by now." He decided to stop listening in on their conversation after that sentence.
Osomatsu sighs and makes his way back down the sidewalk, pausing literal seconds after he picked up his feet when he sees the familiar purple hoodie of the third youngest. Ichimatsu was hunched over just a little bit with his focus drawn downwards towards an orange tabby cat, his left hand digging around in a plastic bag around his wrist for what Oso assumes was a kitty treat. Osomatsu ignores the cat entirely and smiles, prepping himself up with a wide grin before he approaches his younger sibling.
"Hey, Ichimatsu! Where you been?" He calls out once he nears in proximity to the other, the cat by Ichi's feet jumping backwards an inch in surprise.
The one attired in purple turns his head slightly to the left to acknowledge who had spoken to him, but once he notices who it is that's said his name, his attention drifts back to the cat that is no longer by his feet but rather halfway around the block from being far too spooked to stay around. Ichi blows out a long sigh and doesn't even bother turning around once Oso is upon him.
"You are literally the worst." Ichimatsu mumbles out, eyes lingering on the street corner where he'd seen the cat disappear at. Osomatsu slows down his foot steps at the other's words and rubs the back of his neck sheepishly.
"Ah? Just wanted to say hi! Were you seriously shopping for cat food all day, though?" Oso can't stifle the snicker that slips passed his lips, but all in all he was just trying to make light of the negative situation he'd just caused.
Just like most of his jokes, though, it falls flat and Ichi doesn't bother responding. He goes inside with out another word and closes the door, despite Oso being right there.
That was two out of six brothers that Oso had pissed off today despite him not directly meaning to upset them. As eldest he wasn't suppose to deliberately do this shit.
Osomatsu pulls the door open and follows on inside with a faded smile.
--
Three hours later, the eldest Matsuno finds himself sprawled over the couch, arms above his head and legs stretched out firmly, clearly hogging the entire sofa. He hasn't spoken a word to his other brothers in quite some time, though four of them (Choro, Ichi, Kara and Jyushi) are idly doing their own thing respectfully in their corners of the room. Oso lets out a long sigh to hopefully break the silence that has stretched over them.
"Where'd you guys go today?" He says simply, turning his head to glance at each brother as he waits for their responses.
Karamatsu sucks in a quiet breath, as if prepared to spell out his entire day to his siblings, but the small inhale goes virtually unnoticed as Oso tries again.
"Well, I didn't do much! It's boring without you guys h-"
"I could do without your annoying ass voice ruining everything, Osomatsu nii-san." Choro offers up sternly in reference to the previous peaceful silence, flipping the page of his magazine. Nobody throughout the room glances up at Oso, but Kara catches the brief sight of the way his older brother's eyebrows furrow together after being shut down like that. He seems almost embarrassed, and Karamatsu feels rather empathetic.
For once, Osomatsu doesn't know how to deal with the silence. Without the distractions of other voices, he's left with only his own and all day that familiar voice of his sub-conscious has been constantly harboring him about his actions. He hated feeling guilty, but more importantly he hated feeling guilty about being the worst older brother a set of sextuplets could have.
But it wasn't just today! All his life he'd been the instigator of neglect and negativity with his younger siblings. The time he'd totally embarrassed Choro in front of Nyaa-Chan, when he messed up Kara's one chance with a Karamatsu Girl™ by being selfish, when he left Todo's side when he was the subject of bullying... he'd even stolen food and well over his own worth in cash from his brother's, too. It seemed his attendance in his brother's lives was more centered around ruining them then actually being the successful older brother that his parents wish he'd become.
Negative thoughts similar to the ones now circulating around in Osomatsu's head kept building up and he rolls over on the couch to bury his face into one of the cushions, hoping they'd clear out soon. Unfortunately for him though, there was still another brother for him to upset.
"Osomatsu nii-san, really?" A voice calls and Oso sits up quickly, though his heart drops in his chest from the disgusted tone that was being used in the youngest brother's voice.
Todomatsu has just walked in the door but already has a topic on hand to scold his brother about, unknowing that Osomatsu dreads anymore negative confrontation about his bad actions.
The others glance up from their current activities once the one attired in pink crosses the room towards Oso's side, but their overall mood about it is rather uninterested. Karamatsu though, he's worriedly eager to see what kind of nagging Todo is going to push onto him.
"How did you wrack up that much money at Chibita's last night? And why did you make him charge me for it all?"
"Jesus- again?" Choro mumbles under his breath, closing the page of his magazine.
"He did that to me on Wednesday."
"Tuesday!" Jyushi chimes in with.
"All last week, if I remember correctly." Ichi adds on with, not bothering to glance up.
Osomatsu can feel the tips of his ears turning red with embarrassment as each brother throws in their two cents of the deal, though he doesn't notice that Karamatsu has opted out of speaking on their collective bombardment even though Oso's Saturday debt normally went to him.
"Why do you insist on pushing it all on us?" Todomatsu speaks up with, his glare looking expectant.
Oso searches around for a sentence that he can string together as a shitty excuse, but another brother speaks up before he can get a word out.
"What good do you think that's doing for us? Honestly, though." Choro spits out, raising his gaze to join the youngest sibling's.
"Two strikes!" Jyushimatsu calls out, rolling over on his stomach and propping himself up with his elbows.
"Do you think you're a good older brother, Osomatsu-niisan?"
"You're the shittiest one I've seen."
"I really should have been the oldest."
One-liners like those keep coming from his brothers and Osomatsu feels a twinge of betrayal. Though that feeling is nothing compared to the drop in his stomach and the numbness that has settled over his body as he listens to each comment.
He listens to each and every one of them though, and he listens hard. Everything they say, he's tracing their comments back to a moment where he'd wronged one of his younger siblings. They weren't wrong and he knew damn well he was as nasty as his brothers said he was.
Despite all this, Karamatsu is still off to the side with his mouth shut. He knows none of them would notice his absence of participation, so sometimes he was glad he was almost invisible.
"You're by far the most useless!"
The comment by Choromatsu was almost nearly yelled at him, and finally all of the embarrassment that has been coddled inside Osomatsu has curled into an ugly burst of frustration.
He's quick to his feet, so fast that Choro hasn't noticed his older brother's figure standing in front of him until he's tugged forward by the collar of his flannel. One hand grips firm on his shirt while the left is raised and balled into a fist like he actually has the audacity to strike one of his younger brothers in the face.
"You can't even begin to understand the pressure I am constantly under with being the oldest." It shouldn't even matter, they're sextuplets, none of them should even be considered the oldest or youngest but yet he still has to reaffirm his title.
Choro doesn't back down or size up and in fact they're all pretty surprised that Osomatsu would take a serious tone like that with one of them.
"Do you think I like being the oldest? Do you think I wanted to have all this pressure that came with it? I don't know how to be as successful as everyone expects me to be, I don't know how to be the big older brother that you guys want." Each and everyone of his words are ground out through clenched teeth and he knows the only reason he's got such a clenched jaw is because he's trying to not to throw that punch. Osomatsu tries to chose his words carefully, but unfortunately even when his tongue starts to bleed from biting down on it harshly he can't stop the words that pour from his mouth.
"I don't know why the fuck so much is expected out of me!" He gives a laugh in disbelief, like normal to maybe try and lighten the heavy mood that he's just now instilled but it's clouded by the expression he's wearing on his face.
"I have all this responsibility and I'm suppose to lead you guys but I just can't do it." His voice begins to shake and there's no way in hell he's going to cry in front of his brothers like this but eventually his eyes become too blurry and he has to blink.
"Osomatsu nii-san-"
"I hate that I'm not how you guys want me to be. I hate that I'm not as special as you guys are. I've only got one title, I'm only recognized for one fucking thing and I can't even do that right!" Osomatsu has raised his voice and in turn lowered his clenched fist, but he can't help that he's crying and that he's ultimately turning into a fucking mess and this has all happened within the span of a minute or two.
Karamatsu rose to his feet the second Oso did, and he's been listening to every word he's said since. He sympathizes with him. He empathizes with him. He may not be the oldest, but he's next in line and he can vouch from personal experience that some of that elderly-brother pressure has fallen upon himself and it's anything but easy to deal with.
Osomatsu's tight grip on Choro's collar eventually fades and he lets go with a slight shove. Choromatsu is rendered silent and it is now his turn to feel some embarrassment. He doesn't speak as he watches Oso's head fall in defeat but he does watch regretfully as his eldest brother's shoulders shake in a silent sob. He can tell that he's trying not to cry in front of them.
Osomatsu's shaky hands fumble into his jeans pocket as he reaches for his lighter, the other grabbing the pack of cigarettes from inside his red hoodie pockets. None of the brothers go to move after him when he shuffles towards the door with what very little pride he has left, but rather the lot of them are still staring in disbelief.
Karamatsu though, he catches the door on the way out and follows him. He's thankful that none of the others come after.
As expected, Osomatsu doesn't say anything about him being followed and instead lights the cigarette and places it in his lips before taking a long drag. Kara can't make out his brother's current expression in the dark outside like this, but when he brings the bud back to his mouth, the small, glowey red tip of the cigarette reflects against the tears that are still staining Osomatsu's cheeks. Karamatsu didn't actively participate in that session back there, but he still feels god awful that it even happened in the first place.
A minute or two passes and the only sound passing through them is the occasional shaky exhale Osomatsu gives as he breathes out the cigarette smoke. He's trying to forget about his breakdown because he knows he's going to be teased about it later, and even more embarrassment sets in as his thoughts continue to dance around that idea.
Osomatsu's cigarette isn't even burnt halfway yet, but he still puts it out against the railing beside him. It's only then, for some odd reason, that he realizes Karamatsu didn't say anything during that entire ordeal.
He turns to him and Karamatsu is a bit startled and apprehensive about the actions that might follow, but what he's given is not what's expected.
Osomatsu delivers a defeated sigh and pushes his face into the shoulder of Karamatsu's sweatshirt, leaning against him as a shitty way of asking for a hug. Kara is more than happy to deliver, and he's glad that Oso has put this trust in him. He winds his hands around the other's back and pulls him into an embrace.
Moments like these are rare, but Karamatsu is glad that he can step up to be an older brother here.
Osomatsu is pretty okay with it, too.